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🎶 Optional Ending Theme: 🎶
TLDR: The reason this took a while was because I was fighting demons
Look, I swear, it’s all going to be weirdo penis music after this, I’m actually pretty scared there may be some complaints regarding tonal shift going forward since I’m still trying to figure out how I’m going to approach it. But I had to make this...like this for a reason.
If there’s any concerns: I’m going to meet with my therapist again soon for the first time in ages, the only reason I didn’t go earlier was because I didn’t know if my family could afford it. (She’s good at her job, that’s why she’s expensive, I love her to bits)
I TALK A LOT. get used to it
Writing and planning BA IV.5 is genuinely fun! I haven’t written in a good while. But suffice to say my brain is really not working with me. I don’t want to go into details for obvious reasons, but I’m going back to therapy for a reason. The exhaustion of real life is keeping my motivation to be creative (not just write, because this chapter was originally going to get posted with art) six feet deep. Also... I’m a slow writer/reader. Like, really slow. It doesn’t help that I can’t even indulge in leisure media consumption because of my fatigue. I don’t want this to seem like I’m just trying to whine at people, I just feel like my lack of output warrants a bit of explanation.
I must confess: I, too, had to re-learn to love Sloth’s Pit.
I love Robert very much. I cannot state enough just how much I love him. I didn’t write this intentionally as a vent or something, and I don’t want to call it one despite the fact it arguably is (albeit unintentionally), but when I gave myself the rough framework for this chapter and sat down to write it, I felt... a lot of things. None of it is really worth talking about here in detail. But it felt right. I saw myself in Robert when I was reading BA II for the first time, and I saw myself in him when BA IV ended. He just like me fr
The ending of BA IV broke me, honestly. I explained Robert as a character to a friend of mine who isn’t that knowledgeable on SCP as a whole and wanted to know why I was being so chatty about him and that weird little Black Autumn series again, and literally just retelling his story got me bawling. I know I go by nomoretears, but the truth is I’m a huge crybaby.
Now, another likely immediate thought I have to debunk: Liv is not a thoughtform, and she’s not The Narrative in human form. I’m not going to say what/who she is or how she came to be in-universe, because it is genuinely complicated and there’s going to be more regarding her later. Maybe not anything explicit, but stuff to try to concoct some answers together.
I’m a little nervous about starting off like this, because it’s not like BA IV.5 is plot-centric or anything. Sure, you’ll eventually get to see who’s behind the wheel of the Tin Lizzy, alongside what the hell is going on, but it’s not like the characters are going to be uncovering a massive mystery.
I’ve had a wonderful time writing and anticipating the Villain of this part, he’s the best. I guess it bears more in common with the existing tales on the site, but in terms of format and wider story it is still a Black Autumn part, just with a little funk. Winq wonq. I actually stole the ‘.5’ idea from Touhou spinoff titles, if that indicates any design philosophy in this!
I’m hoping the other chapters won’t take as long as this, or at least if they do I’ll be able to show a lot for it. For a short period of time I genuinely was going to try to write 31 chapters. Black Autumn parts tend to have chapter counts ranging from 11-14, so chances are it’ll be within that range. Unfortunately, my immediate future looks to be pretty busy. I got lucky getting the bulk of this chapter done during homecoming week.
Thank you so much for reading the first chapter of BA IV.5! There’s a lot hidden in here, and I got super experimental with it, my personal angst managing to sneak itself in aside.
Additionally, thank you to both DarkStuff and yachiekitcho for peeping some looks at this while it was in the works! And thank you to remiliascarlets, rosy saturniidae, LOVEMARGINAL, Zertas, and so many more friends for helping me out even in the smallest ways! Say you didn't do much all you want, you are filled with nothing but my love for y'all.
I linked author pages/socials wherever I felt was okay-- if you're on here and you want to get linked as opposed to just named, please let me know, I am a slow little baby.
To be continued in the next chapter: What became of the Tin Lizzy, What everyone else is doing, and most importantly... a reminder that a woman’s place is in the House... and Senate.
...I can probably write a better teaser than that later. Note to self: Do that.
Works Referenced/Quoted:
- Shakespeare's Macbeth
- Panama by Van Halen
- Merry Go Bye-Bye by Mr Bungle
IIRC there aren't any smaller references to other media, but that'll likely be a bit more prevalent later. I'll make note of them if I catch them again.
nomoretears
10/20/2022
Last edited: 10/23/2022
October 1st is...
National Homemade Cookie Day (USA) (Rita's is Local!)
National Astronomy Day, Part 2 (USA)
International Raccoon Appreciation Day
International Music Day
The Anniversary of the Panama Canal Zone Ceasing Operation (1979)
The Anniversary of the Ford Model T's Circulation (1908)
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